Nick and I were married on February 4, 2023, and spent our first Valentine’s Day at Le Grand Colbert in Paris. There, we had oysters and Champagne, lobster, scallops with a side of mashed potatoes (naturally) and profiteroles for dessert. This year, we’ll be at a wedding on our anniversary, and Valentine’s Day coincides with Ash Wednesday, a day of fasting and abstinence from meat for us Catholics. So I’ll be attempting a romantic homemade meal to celebrate both occasions on the unremarkable second Saturday of the month.
Looking through my phone, confronting my strange habit of taking pictures of memorable meals, I was reminded that our first year of marriage has involved a lot of hosting, dining out and dining in.
In March, my in-laws visited us in New York City over the St. Patrick’s Day weekend. My menu was themed accordingly. To start: burrata, orange slices and arugula, arranged to look like the Irish flag. For main: my mum’s Irish stew, featuring braised beef, bacon, mushrooms, beef stock, bouquet garni, onions, garlic and a whole can of Guinness. Mum explained to me over FaceTime that you know when the meat is ready when you can easily slice it with a spoon, but it’s not so soft that it crumbles. This was served with baked potatoes, as well as Brussels sprouts. For dessert, I followed a no-bake Bailey’s cheesecake recipe, decorated it with edible green shamrocks, and served it with ice cream to cut the sweetness.
In April, my parents visited for Holy Week. This was less stressful. Feeling I had less to prove, I gladly accepted my mum’s offer to cook on Easter Sunday, when we were hosting friends. She made a delicious lasagna but couldn’t remember the recipe when I asked. I later found an alternative recipe by “Tasty” titled “How to Make the Ultimate Lasagne,” which explains the best choices for each layer, discovered through trial and error, and turned out beautifully.
We have hosted several “game nights” at our apartment. These aren’t your typical board games; they involve livelier participation. One such is “Secret Hitler,” the object of which depends on whether your party membership is liberal or fascist. If you are a liberal, the object is to detect the fascists, thwart their policies and kill off Hitler. If you’re a fascist — and all fascists except Hitler are known to each other — then the object is to pass fascist policies, elect Hitler chancellor and evade detection by sowing confusion and suspicion among the liberals. We invite an eclectic, opinionated bunch, Jews and Catholics. For dinner we order pizza (no pork), served with beer.
Our best dates as newlyweds happened during our visits to Washington, during which we stopped by our old haunt in Georgetown, Martin’s Tavern. At dinnertime, Martin’s is a romantic fine-dining experience: get the steak or crab cakes. At brunch, it’s a rustic, delightful, old-timey joint: get the breakfast burrito or French toast. Or get both if you’re newlyweds and split everything 50/50 as a cute gesture (read: insurance policy). One of the restaurant’s booths is where JFK proposed to Jackie. Nicholas says he thought about proposing there but settled on popping the question at St. Vincent Ferrer’s church in New York. Though I do love Martin’s, this was the better choice.
Our favorite NYC-based date night location has been Moti Mahal Delux, an Indian restaurant on the Upper East Side. Indian food is one cuisine America has failed to crack. But Moti’s signature “butter chicken,” or murgh makhani, is as good as any you’ll find in Britain. The kurkuri gobhi, essentially fried cauliflower tossed in coconut chili, is another favorite.
For weeknight meals, my repertoire has improved to a cycle of regulars. I have Ina Garten to thank for many of these. Her salmon with lentils is great comfort food for any season. The lentils are cooked in broth along with leeks, carrots, celery, onions and thyme. The salmon is pan-fried on either side and then popped in the oven to bake. The veggies, once cooked, are topped off with some red wine vinegar. It also makes great leftovers. (The only off-putting aspect of this meal was discovering that the farm-raised Trader Joe’s salmon I’d be using has pink dye in it to disguise its natural gray.) I’ve discovered her shrimp and linguine Fra Diavolo as well, a tomato-based dish with a peppery kick and a crunch to it. Sometimes I swap out the panko topping with parmesan since I probably wrongly assume almost every meal can be improved by cheese.
We discovered early on in our marriage that I preferred cooking and Nick preferred cleaning. I can’t say I have much talent for cooking, but I will follow a recipe with absolute precision and am committed to expanding my skills. Nick, meanwhile, is an ideal person to cook for: both eager and easy to please.
This article was originally published in The Spectator’s February 2024 World edition.
