Sorry for the delay: Cockburn has been busy bleaching his eyes after watching the trailer for Meghan Markle and Prince Harry’s newest venture, a Netflix documentary on "their story."

https://twitter.com/netflix/status/1598287753774477312

People magazine claimed, “It's Meghan Markle and Prince Harry like you've never seen them before,” which makes Cockburn question if the publication has had its eyes and ears shut for the last two years.

The documentary series, which is composed of six episodes and will premiere in December, includes personal footage of the pair at their wedding reception, on a trip to Africa and while Meghan is pregnant.

But...

Sorry for the delay: Cockburn has been busy bleaching his eyes after watching the trailer for Meghan Markle and Prince Harry’s newest venture, a Netflix documentary on “their story.”

People magazine claimed, “It’s Meghan Markle and Prince Harry like you’ve never seen them before,” which makes Cockburn question if the publication has had its eyes and ears shut for the last two years.

The documentary series, which is composed of six episodes and will premiere in December, includes personal footage of the pair at their wedding reception, on a trip to Africa and while Meghan is pregnant.

But what’s a Meghan and Harry venture without the doom? The trailer also includes footage of Meghan wiping away tears. Perfect timing! They also included footage of Prince William and Catherine while alluding to tension. Also opportunely timed, as the Prince and Princess of Wales just arrived in the US for their royal tour.

“Why did you want to make this documentary?” the couple is asked in the promo.

“No one sees what’s happening behind closed doors,” Harry says. “I had to do everything I could to protect my family.”

Meghan then says, “When the stakes are this high, doesn’t it make more sense to hear our story from us?”

Save yourself the bother next time Whinge and Ginge — when someone asks why you’re doing something, just say “cash.”

Royal insiders have told Cockburn exactly what they think about the couple’s new flick. It included some expletives that Cockburn couldn’t possibly write. But the source also said “How on earth does this pair have anything left to say?”

Cockburn must give credit where it’s due though: at least the demanding duchess didn’t insist on her title being included in the name, which is just “Harry & Meghan.”

Cockburn is off to stock up on popcorn and bourbon for this one, seeing as his editors will demand him to watch the whole damn thing. Is anybody else hiring?