Cockburn spent this morning mentally reliving the trauma of the 2016 election after reading the latest installment of Doug Schoen’s shilling campaign for another Hillary bid for the presidency.
Schoen, a Democratic pollster and former employee of Clinton’s, has an entire CV of pro-Hillary op-eds to his name. Here now is the definitive ranking of his pro-Clinton hack jobs.
5. ‘The Hillary Moment,’ November 21, 2011
This daring ode, the first in the series, speaks of his deep infatuation with the Queen of Chillin’ in Cedar Rapids long before she sparred with The Donald. Here, he begs for Obama to step down after his first term lest he lose to the Republicans — a take that didn’t age well after 2012.
“Mrs. Clinton’s approval rating at an all-time high of 69 percent,” Schoen wrote. Little did he know that she’d approach the election with the second-worst unfavorability rating for a presidential candidate in our nation’s history. Adding insult to injury to Schoen’s point, Trump beat Clinton despite his unfavorability being worse than Clinton’s. Needless to say, this article aged like milk on a hot summer day.
4. ‘Hillary vs. Trump in 2020? If Clinton is serious, here’s the best way for her to defeat the president,’ October 15, 2019
In this op-ed, Schoen, almost unbelievably, puts down his former business partner’s chances at winning the nomination. He writes, “In my view, Clinton entering the 2020 race would do the party an enormous disservice,” though he goes on to give her political advice anyway. Less than a month after the article ran, Schoen went on Fox News to advise Hillary, “Go home. Close the door. Shut your mouth. Be quiet. And just forget about this.”
3. ‘Hillary Clinton’s 2024 Election Comeback,’ January 11, 2022
Notably coming out of his Clinton funk, Schoen laughably begs for another Clinton run, calling her a “change candidate,” which is to blaspheme the dictionary. The only change Hillary ever brought about was to the Gaddafi regime at the cost of American lives in Benghazi. Cockburn thinks, “What a joke.”
2. ‘Democrats are on the decline — could Hillary Clinton save them?,’ January 1, 2022
It only gets better. Here, Schoen critiques the Biden administration’s botched job on Afghanistan and limp-wristed approach to China — fair critique. His answer? “Clinton would be tougher on China for their undemocratic actions toward Taiwan and Hong Kong… With regard to the Middle East, though Clinton has voiced skepticism about the Iranians, she was more cautious in her approach to the Iran Nuclear Deal than the president she served under.” Seemingly Schoen didn’t put together that Trumpian Republicans represent all of this and then some. Cockburn thinks that Schoen realizes the Democratic Party has a thing or two to learn from Trump.
1. ‘Now more than ever, Democrats need Hillary Clinton,’ July 3, 2022
Schoen, in his latest installment, frosts the cake with his decadent love for Hillary. Ridiculously, he says, “Regardless of one’s own political affiliation or opinion of Clinton, the country knows her as an experienced politician and a champion of women’s rights.” Cockburn can’t help but remember Hillary’s attempted intimidation and discrediting of her husband’s accusers. And while Schoen says Hillary will have a moment in light of the overturning of Roe v. Wade, Cockburn can’t help but think of how the sexually abusive profit from abortion.
Perhaps Schoen should follow his own advice: “Go home. Close the door. Shut your mouth. Be quiet. And just forget about this.”
