Doug Burgum maims himself playing basketball on eve of debate

Just call him Dunk Burgum!

North Dakota governor Doug Burgum suffered a late setback on the eve of the first Republican presidential debate. Burgum was whisked off to the ER Tuesday night, according to CNN’s Dana Bash, after “suffering an injury while playing a game of pick-up basketball with his staff.”

The rumor on the ground in Milwaukee is that Burgum has injured his Achilles, per Cockburn’s spies, throwing his appearance at tonight’s debate into doubt. Cockburn has reached out to the Burgum campaign for confirmation.

Billionaire Burgum made a surge for the debate stage thanks to a creative fundraising scheme that saw a $1 donation rewarded with a $20 gift card. Could that mega-splurge have been in vain?

There is frantic chatter online among the other 1 percenters that Burgum’s slot, should he be unable to attend, should be given to Larry Elder, who is currently suing the RNC to stop the debate after being denied qualification.

Cockburn wishes the North Dakota governor a speedy recovery — an Achilles tear can rule you out for nine months in the NFL, let’s hope the turnaround is quicker for pointless presidential runs…