Step aside Zohran, Eric Adams can make things cheap too!

Democratic mayoral nominee Zohran Mamdani has declared that in his New York City, buses will be free, childcare will be free, rent will be frozen and government-run grocery stores will light up the crime-riddled horizon. Cockburn thinks current Mayor Eric Adams, now running as an Independent, must have read Zohran’s free-stuff-for-New-Yorkers list and spotted a hole: WiFi.

In a press conference yesterday, Adams was joined by the city’s office of Housing Preservation and Development to announce their new $3.25 million plan to provide free WiFi to low-income New Yorkers in 35 government-subsidized buildings. “Liberty Link will deliver free and low cost internet to 2,200 households across the Bronx and Upper Manhattan. . . . Today, we’re bringing Section 8 online,” the Mayor said.

Then he walked over to a four-foot grey box with three lightbulbs protruding from its front. He flipped a switch on the back, and the thing lit up and made the same sound as a 1980s pinball machine. Adams resumed his spot at the podium and said, “Nothing like a good prop.”

Adams’s announcement comes after his appearance on the New York Post‘s podcast yesterday, in which he said again that almost all of Zohran’s socialist promises are unattainable. Adams said, “I truly believe the worst thing you can do as New Yorkers are struggling is to make broken promises,” referencing his opponent’s promise to raise income tax for the top 1 percent of New Yorkers. “He can’t raise the income tax, so he’s making these false promises,” Adams said.

The Mayor also took a moment to thank President Trump for taking control of the border. “When the migrant and asylum-seekers crisis came to the city, we received over 237,000 migrants. . . . At its peak, we were receiving 4,000 a week.” Adams took several trips to DC during the crisis to ask then-President Biden to send the migrants elsewhere. In an interview with Tucker Carlson from January, Adams said Grandpa Joe’s only advice for him was to “be a good Democrat.”

“We’re now down to less than 100 migrant asylum seekers coming into our city a week, and that’s due to the security of the border. The Trump administration secured the border, and because of that, you’re not seeing the thousands of people coming in. And it has been a real relief for our city. As you stated, it cost us $7.7 billion,” Adams said.

It appears as though Adams is settling well into his Independent persona, trying to appeal to everyone. He’s showing Democrats he’s all about welfare, and he’s showing Republicans he’s still a fiscally responsible, America First kind of guy. Cockburn can’t help wondering if Adams is trying to channel some of Elon Musk’s energy by naming “Liberty Link” so suspiciously close to Starlink.

Currently, Zohran is polling 12 points ahead of Andrew Cuomo (now running as an Independent), 22 points ahead of Adams and 17 points ahead of Republican nominee Curtis Sliwa. New York City’s mayoral election is still a little over three months out, set for November 4. Cockburn can hardly wait.