Republican mass debate hysteria

Justice Louis D. Brandeis advocated for “more speech” as the best remedy for falsehood. But how much speech is too much speech? The Republican Party is pushing the upper limits, scheduling even more primary debates in the new year — even without President Trump.

CNN is hosting two of them: one on January 10 at Drake University in Iowa and a second on January 21 at St. Anselm College in New Hampshire. Between the two, ABC News and WMUR-TV will host one in coordination with the New Hampshire Republican State Committee on January 18… also at St. Anselm College in New Hampshire. The ABC debate is “subject to RNC guidelines,” rather than being RNC sanctioned.

Why? Per CNN, “The Republican National Committee is expected to announce this week it will release candidates from its requirement that prevents them from participating in non-RNC-sanctioned debates.”

Up to this point, the RNC had reportedly been asking for $2 million from networks and outlets as the price of hosting an officially sanctioned debate — perhaps part of an effort to refill the coffers after splurging on Trump legal bills. That amount was prohibitively expensive to almost every right-leaning outlet except for Fox — a Newsmax source told Cockburn, “I don’t think we have the resources” when he asked why more conservative channels were being passed over for moderate and liberal alternatives. With an RNC rule change though, that could open the door to even more clashes between Ron, Nikki, Vivek and Chris.

Cockburn is skeptical that any further debate between the undercard candidates will move the needle much — at least, while Trump remains the front-runner and a free man…

OnlyFans daughters > nepo babies

DC is a city where nepotism abounds. The children of politicians often depend on daddy’s connections to land themselves a cushy role on the Hill. So props to Republican congressman Brandon Williams’s daughter for having the entrepreneurial spirit to forge her own path — by selling her nudes on OnlyFans.

The twenty-seven-year-old BBW is a Twitch streamer and former game developer who offers her subscribers a generous selection including, and excuse Cockburn, “dick ratings,” “nude reviews” and “intimate DMs.” Her father, the congressman for New York’s 22nd district, had been fending off barbs from two disgruntled former staffers, as well as ousted congressman George Santos, who threatened to “expose” what his daughter did. (According to Politico, “Williams said the former aide delivered a personal jab at the lawmaker: ‘Hey, fuck you! Guess what, bitch? All I have to do is pay $7 to watch your daughter shove her phone up her pussy!’”)

Cockburn hastens to point out that Williams Jr. has almost a hundred times the number of Twitter/X followers of her congressman father, where she does more than her fair share of “exposing” in her own right. And besides, are her antics really any more embarrassing than what our esteemed members do for donors every day?

Congressman Williams is thought to be considering standing down after the debacle — thankfully we can depend on our children’s support once we retire…

Cockburn’s Christmas at the White House

Cockburn kicked off the festive party season in style — by convincing a hack friend of his to take him as a plus-one to the White House. The invite-only event was to thank journalists who cover the administration regularly — and naturally Cockburn’s efforts to dredge up the District’s indiscretions meant he’s unlikely to secure admission in his own right. Spotted: all the leading lights of mainstream broadcast media — ABC’s Martha Raddatz, CNN’s Wolf Blitzer, Laura Coates, David Chalian and Jake Tapper, NBC’s Lester Holt, Andrea Mitchell and Al Roker — along with top White House officials such as John Kirby and Jeff Zients. Jen Psaki and Symone Sanders, who have managed to straddle the divide between those two camps deftly, were also in attendance.

Guests were treated to a buffet of crab legs and lamb cutlets and kept well-oiled on Champagne. President Biden, fresh off a 2 p.m. lid, arrived with First Lady Jill and gave gruff, brief remarks, which were difficult to make out but involved an expression of gratitude to the media and a pledge that he was working to free jailed journalists overseas such as Austin Tice. The First Couple then headed downstairs to pose for photos with the journos in attendance, the two-hour line for which snaked throughout the complex, leading to a photo call expertly shepherded by press secretary Karine Jean-Pierre. After being ushered out at 9:30, Cockburn found himself hankering for more. Can you offer him it? Email your invite to cockburn@thespectator.com.

George Santos was built for Cameo

From Congress to Cameo: George Santos is making the most of his influencer status after being kicked out by his colleagues. The savvy businessman-cum-alleged fraudster is currently charging $500 a clip and has been kicking up his rates by $100 a day all week (take notes, Congressman Williams’s daughter). The most talked about of his videos was paid for by Senator John Fetterman’s team, where Santos bids good wishes to New Jersey senator Bob Menendez, who is facing a corruption and bribery probe. 

But Cockburn’s favorite is this one, where Santos says he’s “so proud” of his client for “coming out as a furry.” For those blissfully uninformed up until this point, Merriam-Webster defines a furry as “a person who identifies with and enjoys sometimes dressing as anthropomorphic animals or creatures especially as a member of a fandom devoted to the practice.” Santos compliments the user’s “fursona” which is a “beaver-pus: a beaver and a platypus.” “I’m so proud that the corporate folks at Arby’s gave you the go-ahead to go to work in your persona,” Santos concludes, “yiff, yiff, yiff!” Forget New York’s 3rd, forget Kitarra Ravache: this, Cockburn feels, is George Santos’s true calling.