Everyone must watch this One America News rap song

Move over Oliver Anthony: there’s a new parallel economy music sensation in town. Forgiato Blow, the self-described “Mayor of Magaville,” released a new fiery masterpiece: “REAL AMERICA.” The song, which features Dan Ball, the host of One America News Network’s Real America, is in fact very Real; the bars in it are Realer still. 

The music video begins with an introduction from OANN’s Ball, “We got breaking news: the 45th president of the United States Donald J. Trump has been indicted for the fourth time by a corrupt Biden regime justice system, and patriots are fed up.” Following this, with smooth slow-motion transitions, South Florida white rapper Blow joins Ball on set. 

“Voters got rights. Wave them flags and the Stars and Stripes. Indicting presidents, that’s not right. If questioning the outcome of elections is a crime, then get me life,” spits the face-tattooed rapper.

Adding to the fire, Mr. Blow, who previously blessed us with a collab with “Real Businesswoman” Marjorie Taylor Greene declares, “Fuck you Democrat pedophiles rigging the system.”

With this latest release, Mr. Blow, whose real name is Kurt Jantz and who has already been the subject of a VICE profile, has cemented his kingship in the MAGA rap world.

On the scene, he joins other noted rhymesmiths such as “Let’s Go Brandon” rapper Loza Alexander; Lil’ Wayne, who endorsed Trump before the 2020 election; Lil’ Pump, who posted a mugshot in solidarity with the Donald last week, and of course Kanye “Ye” West. Oh, and lest we forget rising conservative figures such as presidential candidate Vivek Ramaswamy, who borrowed rhymes from an artist that clearly hates his guts (Eminem) to impress a crowd of prospective voters in Iowa earlier this month. 

Cockburn senses that the rap Red Wave is growing — and when it hits shore, it will change America forever. For the residents of Magaville, the culture shock is imminent.

In recent weeks, many have looked to Oliver Anthony, the author of “Rich Men North of Richmond,” for leadership. After all, we saw Fox News moderator Martha MacCallum open the first Republican presidential primary debate with a question about the song last week. But Anthony doesn’t want the mantle of conservative culture warrior: he claims that he didn’t want his patently political song to be politicized. The throne, therefore, is Mr. Blow’s for the taking.

If Vivek wants the MAGA base vote, then he has to step up, stop rapping Eminem and start rapping “REAL AMERICA.” If Trump truly wants a revolutionary comeback, then he should cut the Village People from his rally playlist and blast some Blow. 

Conservatives are thirsty for some culture — and Mayor Blow can quench that thirst. Cockburn can’t wait for his swearing-in.