What’s preventing a repeat of the Senate twink scandal?

Gay-PMG

Grüezi from Switzerland, friends. A Cockburn spy was recently hoping to enjoy a quiet lunch at an Irish pub in Zurich’s Old Town when he was sat next to a large group of somewhat intoxicated KPMG Switzerland employees. It was quite the liquid lunch, with beers and wine flowing for hours and one staffer suggesting a round of shots, a move that was quickly rejected from the already too-far-gone group. One American employee of the firm was waxing lyrical about KPMG’s alleged hopelessly bigoted management. The employee was making a video for the company’s LinkedIn page to celebrate Pride Month but was told a shot of him in a full-blown make-out session with another man was too much for the family-friendly page; he was asked to remove it before getting approval to post the video. You can watch the actual clip that went up for Pride Month here.

In a separate incident, the employee was told he could only have a Pride flag next to his pronouns in his email signature during Pride Month. The employee was furious and escalated the incident to management and even called in the firm’s DEI manager to go after the anti-flag homophobe. “They fucked with the wrong person,” the employee slurred to his colleagues. Another KPMG staff member summed up the incidents: “You can be gay, but not too gay!”

What’s preventing a repeat of the Senate twink scandal?

It’s the most wonderful time of the year: Cockburn’s gossip column is marking the one-year anniversary of one of its finest editions. A year ago this week, in these virtual pages, your dogged correspondent had the grave duty of informing you of the sordid acts taking place in Room 216 of the Hart Senate Building, the scene of the Kavanaugh hearings. Two men had filmed themselves in flagrante delicto — and their footage was making the rounds in DC gay circles. Shortly after Cockburn’s missive, the Daily Caller published a censored version of the video, nonetheless clearly depicting the man we now know as “the Senate twink” bottoming on Senator Amy Klobuchar’s desk. (Justice for Mayor Pete!)

The story set Washington ablaze in a manner that does justice to Cockburn’s namesake from the War of 1812. The twink in question, Aidan Maese-Czeropski, was relieved of his post as a legislative aide for elderly Maryland senator Ben Cardin and vanished into the aether. (Earlier in the week, he had caused a minor commotion after yelling “free Palestine” at Representative Max Miller, a Jewish Republican.) An investigation was carried out into the tryst, with the US Capitol Police determining that what had unfolded constituted a “breach of congressional policy” rather than a crime.

So, one year on, what’s to stop gregarious and concupiscent Hill staffers from following in the footsteps of Maese-Czeropski and his mystery man and repeating the act? Not much, it appears: you can still do as he did, book a high-profile room in the name of your member and rut away to your Hart’s content. “Honestly, screwing me in my representative’s office would present much more of a challenge,” a Democratic staffer drily observed to Cockburn this week.

For the sake of cleanliness in the Capitol, Cockburn sincerely hopes that the trans activists currently taking issue with Nancy Mace’s bathroom crusade aren’t tempted to make their protests even more X-rated…

The twisting fates of Cox and Weiner

Anthony Weiner and T.J. Cox are both disgraced former Democratic members of Congress, forever united in having unfortunate last names.

In recent days, Weiner and Cox have seen their paths differ, however. Weiner, ever a glutton for punishment, is back in the game: the former mayoral candidate-turned-convicted sex offender is reportedly eyeing a campaign for New York City Council. Hey, he certainly has the name recognition.

Cox, a former California congressman, meanwhile pled guilty to two counts of fraud and will pay millions of dollars in restitution. “Prosecutors,” the Associated Pressreported, “said Cox stole more than $1.7 million in diverted client payments and company loans and investments. They also alleged Cox created false records and a fraudulent loan guarantee in order to secure a $1.5 million construction loan through a sports nonprofit for improvements at Granite Park, a sports complex in Fresno.”

While Cox may yet avoid the prison time Weiner served, it’s still a disappointing finish for the once-promising Democrat. Perhaps Cox should be reaching out to Weiner for a tip on how to handle life inside…

Sleigh queen

Cockburn braved the rain Tuesday to jingle down to the National Press Club for a joint Christmas party hosted by polling firm JLPartners and the Daily Mail. The affair was decidedly less outré than the Mail’s NYC rager; attendees found the proceedings punctuated by a brief presentation from the British polling firm, as co-founder James Johnson walked through how their model had resulted in the most accurate prediction of the 2024 election. In attendance: Boris Ephsteyn, Jason Miller, Politico’s Natalie Allison, the Times of London’s Alistair Dawber, NBC News’s Katherine Doyle, the Independent’s Andrew Feinberg, the Hill’s Julia Manchester and Sarakshi Rai, Semafor’s Shelby Talcott and a healthy complement from the Mail itself, including Rob Crilly, new US editor-in-chief Katie Davies, Emily Goodin, Matt London, Wills Robinson, Nikki Schwab and Charlie Spiering.

On Wednesday, Cockburn again headed out in the drizzle, first to the British Embassy for some Christmas drinks in their on-site pub, Bar 3100. He sipped Coronas and rubbed shoulders with embassy staff and hacks from the Times, the Hill, Politico and Sky News. Then it was off across town to the Willard for a very glitzy soirée, the Newsmax Christmas party. Spotted: Roma Daravi, Jessie Jane Duff, Hogan Ridley, Haley Gillman, Dr. Sebastian Gorka, Nathan Klein, Marc Lotter, Keitha Paleski, Chris Plante, Valeria Riccioli, Chris Ruddy, Kelly Sadler, Matt and Mercedes Schlapp, Tony Shaffer, Joe Simpson and Greta van Susteren.

Then Thursday night took him to an event at, sigh, Mission Navy Yard, for a joint party hosted by Matthew Foldi’s Washington Reporter and the Manhattan Institute. Guests enjoyed a free bar and Mexican food. Cockburn saw: Jesse Arm, Joe and Mallory Ballard, Nick Ballas, Doug, Katie and baby Arthur Blair, the Free Beacon’s Meghan Blonder, Willy Chertman, Blayne Clegg and Newsmax’s Marisela Ramirez, the Free Beacon’s Jessica Costescu, Matthew Foldi and Olivia Coleman, Paul Foldi and Bonnie Glick, Aaron Harison, Melanie Meyers, Renu Mukherjee, Tom Mulkeen, Vikram Prasad, Trump campaign social media savant Greg Price, Reihan Salam, Ilya Shapiro and Ryan Young.

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