Biden admin: OK, sure, we do want to ban your gas stoves

Sinema abandons ActBlue

Arizona maverick Kyrsten Sinema has been ruffling feathers this week, after taking a scalpel to the caucus lunches she used to have to attend while a Democrat. “Old dudes are eating Jell-O, everyone is talking about how great they are,” the independent senator told a group of GOP lobbyists today, according to Politico magazine. “The Northerners and the Westerners put cool whip on their Jell-O, and the Southerners put cottage cheese.” A moderate Democratic colleague told the same reporter that Sinema is “the biggest egomaniac in the Senate.” Some honor!

Further proving her independent streak, Sinema has finally changed payment processors, from ActBlue to Anedot, a competitor used mostly by independents and Republicans. Her move comes four months after reporting from The Spectator’s Matthew Foldi which pointed out that Sinema’s switch from (D) to (I) put her in breach of ActBlue’s “Democrat-only” rule.

Biden admin: OK, sure, we do want to ban your gas stoves

It’s a classic case of “that thing that definitely isn’t happening? It’s great that it’s happening.”

Just a few months ago, the right was accused of spreading conspiracy theories when they said the government might be coming for your gas stoves. NPR, the New York Times and other media outlets rushed to deny the new conservative culture war, even though it was a Consumer Product Safety Commission official — not Alex Jones — who sparked the rumor of a gas stove ban.

Sure enough, energy secretary Jennifer Granholm, a former electric battery investor, said yesterday they do want to get rid of some types of gas stoves. And the state government in New York is close to passing legislation that would prohibit builders from putting gas stoves in new homes.

The same people who said it wouldn’t happen? They’re celebrating it. According to them, gas stoves are silent killers, slaying children en masse by giving them lethal cancers and life-long asthma. Who knew?

Politico’s newest journo nepo baby

Cockburn wishes to congratulate Francesca Barber, who is joining Politico as its new “executive director, global newsroom strategy” (no idea either). Barber was previously director of international strategy and operations at the New York Times. She also just so happens to be the daughter of longtime FT editor Lionel Barber. What a coincidence that father and daughter should find themselves in such similar lines of work…

George Santos’s fashion police

New York representative George Santos is finally embracing his reputation as the “Queen of Queens”. The embattled congressman is currently facing a probe from the House Ethics committee, but more importantly, is rumored to have once performed as a drag queen named Kitara Ravache in Brazil. On Thursday, Santos proved his credentials to be a guest judge on Ru Paul’s Drag Race when he gave his honest review of NASA’s new lunar space suit. Santos admitted he didn’t know anything about space travel (a first!) but praised the suit’s “pop of color.”

Will Stormy summon spirits to the witness stand?

The future of the Republic hangs… on potential testimony from Stormy Daniels. What might she say on the witness stand? Cockburn had his fortune told by the adult film star and director back in December, after which she teased significant developments in her case in the year ahead. Perhaps she really can see the future.

She also said that she’d started reading tarot because “I started basically seeing dead people.” Stormy expressed frustration that she couldn’t summon a specific spirit and that the dead visited at random. “It’s almost like the dead come to me and I have to figure out who the living that goes with them are — and everyone else is the opposite.” This throws up some interesting possibilities about who might drift into the Manhattan courthouse during a potential trial. Roy Cohn? Jeffrey Epstein? Cockburn can’t wait to find out.