Who most deserves a Christmas treat from the Commander-in-Chief? It must be his fans and acolytes. And what do they most want? A full-blown Trumpist Chief of Staff in the White House. Now that Nick Ayers has ruled himself out, that could just happen. Trump’s celebrity fan club are all whispering excitedly about the possibility. They think the President should be seeking two qualities: someone who won’t flip and bona fide MAGA credentials. So, media mirror on the wall, who would be MAGAest Chief of Staff of them all?
1) Dan Bongino
He has dedicated his life to ‘owning the libs’. He used to be a Secret Service agent looking after George W. Bush, so he knows his duty: protect and preserve the President at all costs, even if it means losing his life. That surely qualifies him as an ideal Trump Chief of Staff. He has the kind of commitment 45 expects. Trump reportedly regularly name checks Bongino in the White House after watching him on Fox. And Bongino himself just dropped a strong hint he has some big news coming. Responding to ‘Fake News’ (natch) reports that Bongino had been dropped by the NRA, he tweeted:
https://twitter.com/dbongino/status/1072820433722982400
Loyalty:
MAGnificence:
2) Sebastian Gorka
Cockburn understands that President Trump has told Gorka, his former deputy assistant, that he wants to bring him back into the White House fold. Since leaving the administration first time round, Gorka has become one of the President most loyal boosters. Perhaps sensing that the First Lady is increasingly calling the shots, Sebastian has been dutifully praising her on all his media channels.
Loyalty:
MAGnificence:
3) David Bossie
Hotly tipped on Fox, Bossie is the former deputy campaign manager. He just coauthored a book, Trump’s Enemies, with the most loyal Trumpist of all, Corey Lewandowski. Of course, Trump could pick Lewandowski (“loyalty: 10 heads), but Bossie is who everyone is talking about. He has more political experience, having waged war against the Clintons for decades.
Loyalty:
MAGnificence:
4) Newt Gingrich
As Cockburn writes, Newt Gingrich is in the White House. There is frenzied speculation that he might be about to get the Chief of Staff job. He may not be a Trumpist true blood in the Corey Lewandowski vein, but Newt was arguably MAGA before MAGA. He has now been a solid booster for the administration for long enough to be deemed loyal. He has experience of getting things done with a split congress, too, which would appeal to Trump’s sense of savior faire.
Loyalty:
MAGnificence:
5) Donald Trump Jr.
Love campaigning to help true patriot @karringtonsc – she will fight for @realDonaldTrump agenda!#MAGA pic.twitter.com/2bkw89bJLw
— Donald Trump Jr. (@DonaldJTrumpJr) November 5, 2018
What would be more Trump than to keep it in the family? Don Jr. could join Ivanka and Jared and make the White House exactly what Donald and Melania have always wanted it to be, a DC branch of the Trump Organization.
Under great pressure from the Mueller investigation, Don has proved his mettle.
Loyalty:
MAGnificence:
6) Katrina Pierson
Trump would love to show how non-sexist and non-racist he is by appointing a mixed-race single mother as Chief of Staff. She ain’t bad looking, either. She is a fiery former senior campaign adviser with a passion justice. Once arrested for shoplifting, could she steal the 2020 election for Trump?
Loyalty:
MAGnificence:
7) Jacob Wohl
https://twitter.com/JacobAWohl/status/1072602169898164225
(OK joke’s gone too far – Ed.)
Loyalty:
MAGnificence: