Sun, sand, slaves: an influencer’s trip to Qatar

The lure of the junket can tempt even the hardiest of media souls. For Twitter influencers who’ve never heard of an ethical standard, much less adhered to one, they’re catnip. That’s why this week Cockburn has witnessed the embarrassing spectacle of several right-wing personalities shilling for the government of Qatar. Rob Smith, an Iraq War vet who bills himself as “influential, not an influencer,” described his Qatari vacation as “eye-opening.” He also sounded very Baghdad Bob by saying he’s “helping to keep America strong by understanding and highlighting the unique and mutually beneficial military and financial partnerships that we share with Qatar.”

Smith says he asked “tough questions,” yet underwent a barrage of criticism. The Twitter account “Israel War Room” chimed in: “Did you ask why Qatar continues to host and fund Hamas? Or why Qatar has criminalized being LGBTQ+? Or why you’re not allowed to criticize Qatar’s ruling family? Or why leaving Islam is punishable by death in Qatar?” Probably not.

Smith also caught flak for admitting that he didn’t previously know the US had a military base in Qatar. (We literally launched the Iraq War from there.)

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Fellow junketeer Emily “Emily Saves America” Wilson – who readers may recall from her brutal squabble with other ex-Turning Point USA ambassadors earlier this year – published a cute selfie with the caption “So beautiful can’t wait to come back.” “Are the million slaves Qatar holds beautiful too?” someone responded. Who knows whether Emily saw any…

On our radar

CABINET FEVER President Trump presided over a cabinet meeting that has lasted over two hours at the time of writing.

RUSSIAN ROULETTE Not present: special envoy Steve Witkoff, who is in Moscow to meet with Vladimir Putin.

GOOD OL’ ROCKY TOP There’s a special election in Tennessee’s 7th district today, with Republican Matt Van Epps taking on Democrat Aftyn Benn for the chance to replace Cockburn favorite Mark Green.

Are We Dating the Same Oysterman?

Questionably tattooed Maine senatorial candidate Graham Platner has outpaced a lot of controversy during his weird campaign, but he might not be able to escape Facebook whisper networks. A Maine “Are We Dating the Same Guy” page posted a pic of him in November 2024, with “Anonymous member” saying, “Graham, Sullivan. Ghosted me in the past, then popped up on a different dating app. I’m concerned he may have a significant other out there.”

The women of Maine, recognizing a burgeoning public figure trying to escape a lifetime of misdeeds, rose up. One said Platner “used to bully me for being fat and torture me on the bus.” More apropos, another said “I remember him from back in early 2020. We matched, texted every day, planned to meet up multiple times but “things came up” for him. Then ghosted me.”

Naughty Graham. Another whisperer said “We spent time together on and off, last time being 2.5 years ago, I would definitely not recommend on any level. He can hold an intelligent conversation, has some humor, even a little charm…but not relationship material. PM for details.”

Platner, 41, got married last year – and has hopefully transcended the minutiae of the Maine dating app scene. Aside from the Totenkopf, he’s a catch…

Yiannopoulos versus Theranos

On Monday, founder of fraudulent startup Theranos, Elizabeth Holmes (or whoever is running her X account while she is in prison) attacked Milo Yiannopoulos’s reputation online propagated by controversy over his past defense of pedophilia. In particular, she mocked an X post from Milo claiming that “when” he was gay, he was more turbulent, but is now settling into a more stable personality. It is unclear why the two are even interacting; they have little in common except for attitude.

The imbroglio does beg the question of who would win in a fight– an ex-entrepreneur dressed as Steve Jobs or an ex-homosexual niche right-wing celebrity. “Bitch you are NOTHING,” averred Yiannopolous. “FIND GOD.” Given the musings on faith that she has been posting on X from a Texas jail, Cockburn gets the sense that she already has.

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